No naming, evil anonymous

If I died, at least you wouldn't be with me to throw your ball at my court
I have no court, I'm conceited
Ok whatever
Obviously nothing is mine, that much has been ruminated over
It's not like God Almighty is going to eat "not my" supply of ham.
It's not as if my daily over intake of food is being frowned upon by anyone
Intervention would be welcome if there was any possible
I run out of food, more food is provided
And so it goes
Feeding the hungry is against the law
So is protecting the children from their malicious parents
So is caring for children whose parents have been murdered
So is reaching out to console a widow with a simple hug
Fear has kept everyone inside and away from one another
Money and all it can buy provides its' seal of approval

The bridegroom is gone at last, but was I really fasting for Him?
A laugh, as if I'd know where to begin
I'd have to be sick to even consider skipping a meal
During my recent bout of food poisoning I still fought my way to the pantry and forced myself to eat until I could no longer
And still consumed 600 or more calories
The very day I felt up to eating again, my intake skyrocketed to over quadruple that

I don't deserve Heaven
I do deserve Hell, being as I was ever was to be, doing as I lived long enough to remember having done
Yet I help myself to good things, piling them on, hours upon hours, days upon days
When does it end?
What is the cure for cowardice?
What is the cure for being self righteous?