anger one too much

 Apparantly my brother in law and/or my sister has decided I don't meet the requirements of living in a Stephens home.  I have no idea where I'm going to live.  I don't know if I can find anywhere that will allow me to keep my cat.  I hope she tolerates the move well.  Been looking on facebook for places.  I hate these uncertain moments in life.  I wish I could understand why.  But it doesn't matter.  I've tried combating what I see as their basis for ridding themselves of me.  They won't even acknowledge my words.  Any time I have an angry flare to what I say, it gets shot down and I'm left feeling like I may as well not even say anything because they obviously don't care enough about the concerns I have to let me speak honestly.  I don't know how to kindly request that someone quit being stupid or hypocritical or whatever the issue at hand may be at any given moment.
So...that's it for me.  If the place I end up living in slips out from my feet, then ... I don't know what will happen.

goodbye smiles

 goodbye smile
I hope we both make it to Heaven
I'm sorry I didn't make the cut
You may not remember me for much longer anyway
You'll grow up, and forget about me
I'll never a see any of it
I'm sorry for all the tears you cry
I'm sorry for the tears I feel
I feel a drowning.
The whole world hates me
You'll probably hate me secondhand
I don't deserve anything more.
I didn't realize it was unfathomable if I received it anyway
I'm glad to have known you, on some level
What you will become remains to be seen
goodbye
I hope we both meet again
in this life, or the next