Chosen but free

 I don't have a problem with the God's ability and willingness to supercede our will.  If He never did that, we'd be in a world of debilitating agony because sins of the highest and widest reaches would be an obvious blight in our lives.  WW3 would have happened a loooong time ago, rather than being a looming possibility.  

I don't have a problem with who God chooses.  If God wanted to force His salvation on everyone, I'd be happy with that, even if it meant the likes of Adolf Hitler and Ted Bundy were in Heaven.

The problem I have with Calvinism is that it completely ignores the fact that GOD DOES NOT FORCE HIMSELF.  He will seal His children with the Holy Spirit so that there's no turning back from Him, but He will not force you to engage in sanctification.  He will not force you to read His word and to keep His commandments.  To an extent, if you're truly a child of God, you will do all of that, but nobody who is born mentally retarded becomes some legendary pastor.  There is a part of all people, even in their condemned state, that is at home with God.  A person can grow so far away from that by deliberately suppressing the truth and doing everything conceivable to push God away, that God will give that person over to a state of utter unsalvagability, such as what occurred to the Amorites.  The Bible doesn't point out the process of transitioning from death to life because IT'S NOT NECESSARY that a person understand this.  It's also different for different people.  The Bible doesn't say literally everything that just so happens to be true.  There's a good deal of spiritual truth in The Bible, but it doesn't even say everything there is concerning that.  Paul gives a little snippet describing Heaven then stops at "things that are unlawful to speak of."

If a person were to pick between Arminianismn and Calvinism , I'd have to say it's probably to the greater effect to choose Calvinism.  But neither one's writings hold a candle to The Bible.