so this is Xmas (what have I done?)

YEAR ONE - CUT

Unto my nose comes the scents of autumn
Winter is approaching, slowly
The crisp air makes its acquaintance with my nostrils
I feel no complaint as I stroll down the street on my way to the convenience store to acquire a morning latte
I make my way back home and enter the house
The sun has made its way through the skies at last and I feel like celebration
Melodies from the previous autumn enter my heart and flood my head
It’s all about yesteryear, since nothing has changed
I’m living here and now, but I might as well be living in the past
I guess I’m doing both
Strange how nothing goes as it should
Or maybe there really is something I could do
Something to make this year special?
Well, I guess there’s still time
Sunset is many hours away
I suppose life is a series of coincidences
Much of the previous year was aided by people I met
Nobody I planned on meeting
Some of it was aided by tools and services
None of which I planned on discovering
I guess this year will be memorable in its own way
I have my family
My sister’s leaving forever, but she spent nine months of it still here
I moved in with my mother since she can’t afford to not live with my sister, who bought a house that she can’t afford to keep making payments on unless she stays here, which she can’t do, because her husband forbids it
So I live with my mother, so to speak
It’s all good though
I probably will never marry, as sad as it sounds
But I feel OK with that.
I knew for many years that I’m weird
So damn weird
So it is
It took a little bit of time for me to accept it
But I’ve done that much
And Thanksgiving and Christmas have yet to arrive
Oh, and did I mention 2009 is the year of the arrival of the first post-1994 car I’ve ever ridden in on a long term basis?
My so-called friend in high school [we only hung out during school hours, and only saw each other once or twice after graduation, which after reading a passage or two in A Walk To Remember by Nicholas Sparks, strikes me as not much of a friendship, although if it were still the way it was then I might beg to differ…] let me ride around the block in his car. I don’t remember what it was but it wasn’t the ratty old cars my mom’s been driving in the last 20 years give or take a couple…
So…the melodies and sentiments within me are at least partially rooted in the past
Maybe next year I’ll be reminiscing on Cartel’s newest CD (CYCLES)
Maybe I’ll love it more then than I do now
It’ll be awesome
And nostalgic
Wow

October 31st, 2009